Muhammed SIDDIK Hekim(k.s)


ZAWK 1491

I have been the slave of the Universe! There is no contentment!

There is no Tawakkul(Trust in ALLAH)! Avarice-desire-lust(shahwat)-rage(gadhab) ruined my Heart!

I am from the People of Nifaq [*], People of Riya [*], People of the World! I have a lot of troubles!

I asked its SECRET to SIDDIK: He said “Sit down My Son!..Sit down!..”

KUL İhvanî

28.07.1999 12:59

Lârâ Beach in Antalya..

[*] Nifaq: Nifaq means to show conformity – or agreement – and to conceal evil. Nifaq has several types.Ibn Jurayj said of the hypocrite that, “His actual deeds are different from what he publicizes, what he conceals is different from what he utters, his entrance and presence are not the same as his exit and absence.”

[*] Riya: The Arabic term riya’ is roughly translated as “showing off,” which means doing something to please others or to gain their approval and admiration, instead of focusing on receiving God’s approval, satisfaction, and pleasure.


This is a ZAWK , o my NAFS(Self/Soul)!..

READ it right!

UnderstANd the LOVE(Ashk)

Period of my life was passing with interesting questions of life..

I had been retired at a very early age, and I had been partner with my Architect son and another partner, and we were running a business together.

By the special and beautiful help of Rasulullah (saws), I had met with a famous Hafiz from Siirt, my teacher Muhammad SIDDIK Hekim in Antalya.

We had met in Rasulullah (SAWS)  without any searching from me and without any invitation from him.

We had seen each other in Aksaray first in 1971, but we could not be together much as I was still living in Aksaray at that time.

After 1980, I used to go to listen to his sohbats without speaking much to each other except saying “How are you?” .

A time had come and We have BEen “WE” and “ONE”!.

We used to meet in his ‘SOHBATHANE:Meeting Place for spiritual talks as the Prophet Muhammad PBUH used to do with his disciples ’.  His SOHBATHANE has been open for 40 years. This place had a small board above its door saying “BUYURUN” . This meant  “Here you are. Welcome. Come in whomever you are, you will not be asked who you are  whether you are native or not,  in here!…” This place used to be full of crazy and majzub people. What I mean by “crazy” is those who are called “crazy and stranger” by the public as the public could not fit them in to their  understanding of a normal minded category. They were in fact the ones who had the real knowledge. People used to drink from the wonderful tea offered free to them in that place as well.    

My teacher SIDDIK having been blind from birth, he was one of the rare Qur’an Memorisers(HAFIZ), who had learned off  Qur’an by heart from a born blind HAFIZ like himself without reading it from letters just by hearing sound only before he was seven. I think it was in 1967 , he had read the whole Qur’an in the Power of Night(Laylatul Qadr) in Ramadan , during Isha and Tarawih prayer in 5.5 hrs.  I had recorded his voice in to a tape cassette and I still keep it with me, thanks be to ALLAH.

We were in an atmosphere like this.

That night was one of the sacred nights in Islam.

My wife Fatma and our daughter Ahsen were fasting and they wanted me to bring them ice cream at night.

I had joined to the SOHBAT..

Our teacher used not to start to do the Sohbat until I come, and if I am late for an excusable reason , people used to say:

“Don’t keep our teacher wait!”

Our teacher used to love me a lot and one day he had said:

“Praise be to my LORD(RABB) for getting you meet with me !”

I’ve turned his sohbats to a 4 volume book set.

I’ve recorded his sohbats to 100’s of tape cassettes.

We would not agree in some subjects from time to time as he used to carry out ancient Tasawwufi System as it is. However, the time has been bringing new  LOVE(ASHK), MASHK and HUMANbeings..

Anyway,  When we were sitting facing each other on that day, I was thinking to myself inside me saying to my self:

Why am I not living anything? Where are WE at this spiritual run? I wish we could see this and our hearts could calm down! What is the state of my teacher ? I don’t know that either!

Sohbat used to last for 1-2 hours normally.

It had finished and I went to the office and got something from there and started to walk towards the ice cream shop.

But my feet were going in opposite direction. I was saying “what is happening I need to buy Ice Cream but I don’t know why I am going this way”. I found my self in a region all of a sudden at a moment(AN).

My mind was with me but my recalling (remembering) and memory was Zero. . I was not able to stop my self from going or moving.

“ What is this place? Where are we?” I asked to some people but I could not figure out where I am. I realised that I am in a “yaqaza: Conscious State between sleep and awakeness”.

There wasn’t an hour to evening.

I said to an old person: “I have been a stranger here, is there any place of prayer(masjid) around here at all? Could you please lead me there!”  I said.

He brought me to a very  old and small Masjid behind “Merkez Bank” and he has gone..

When I entered inside the Masjid, I saw someone sitting in the middle like a frozen statute, with a short beard on his face as if he had not cut it for a few weeks, with rosy cheeks.

I said ‘salamun alaikum: May peace be upon you’ to him but He was not at the state of receiving aSalam”.  

I felt like a part of my head was working and the other part was not.

I prayed 2 rakats of prayer. I sat down for dhikr, but all of a sudden I found myself in a valley where ‘Karbala Desert’ meets the mountains. In 1989, when we were going to Umra, our bus driver had gone in to this area by bus not to enter Karbala city, and he had come to Karbala Desert where Saddam’s soldiers had stopped us and brought back to Karbala City again. We had lost 7-8 hours because of this.

These were the mountains I was seeing at that time. In that  valley, I was alone. I was drenched in perspiration.

A voice said to me : “ Your nine cities of poem are being ruined!..A flood of sand is inundating them. Quick, run!”

At those times, I had finished 9th  volume of my Love Book including my poems. I run towards the valley by saying my gardens of poem are being destroyed. When I entered in to the valley, I saw that a dreadful devastating flood of sand is flowing and swallowing every thing. It had already swallowed everything over the valley. When I arrived, it had swallowed the beginning of the 9th city. The other sections which were close to me were full of various roses, flowers, gardens, mansions which I was recognizing. It was swallowing them like the sea swallows something without leaving anything behind.

And then I said “ what is this ? I am still alive. Something is happening and l am living this now!

Such a strong wind was blowing that I exclaimed,  asking:

What is this wind O my Lord(Ya RaBB)?

A voice, filling the heavens  : “THE WIND OF AZIZU’L-HAKIYM(Exalted in Might and the Owner of Wisdom [*]) !

Whole mountains had also joined to this Voice.

Then I said “So, the doomsday (kiyamat) happened but I did not notice it !”

 [*] AL- ‘AZIZU (J.J) [Qur’an Ref: 59/23]  (dhatī)( اَلْعَزِيزُ) : the Victorious. Exalted in Might. The ONE whose power overcomes everything and always Victorious.

And last roses , flower gardens and the mansions of my 9th city of Poem were surrendering to the sand and being swallowed by it.

Right at that moment , 7 graves appeared in front of me.

 Amazing, these are My Graves ! When did I die?” I said.

The wind had opened the one in front of my feet by digging it out.

My arm and leg bones had come out.

I took one of them in my hand and it crumbled to pieces in my palm.

“Perhaps It has been 500 years since I died! This is my BODY GRAVE!” I said.

On the second one , there was a piece of skin with red blood over it and the big part of it had dried.

“This is also my NAFS (Self/Soul) GRAVE!” I said.

The third one was in fact like the WATER in a bowl.

 “That is also my HEART GRAVE!” I said. 

Fourth one, as for that,  was like a shimmering flame at sparkles, making sound ,’phırrr phırrr phırrr’ . 

“That too is my SPIRIT(ROOH) GRAVE !” I said.

 While I was looking at my graves, in an instANt moment, I realised that the flood of sand had raised to the level of my knees, and I was feeling like it will not leave me if I get caught completely. I was feeling its heat already. So I run towards the left shoulder of the valley with all my strength. Every thing that I hold onto , was remaining in my hand in that very steep slope, and the flood of the sand was also rising with me.

I was sure that I was alive and my fear was horrifying.. Sometimes when I was climbing up by holding on to a rooted grass, I was seeing that my finger nails were being removed off and the blood was flowing from their places..

Having drenched in perspiration, I kept trying to climb with my full effort . More I climbed up, less the sound of the valley was being heard. Because a horrifying sound of rumbling was getting less and remaining below.

I reached to a place with so much difficulty and this place was like a PARADISE/GARDEN(JANNAT) while the doomsday was happening below.

I was very tired and alone. I sat down and watched what was going on below. My feet were bare. My clothes were ripped. But a very mild and nice wind was blowing where I was sitting. It was bringing such beautiful fragrances that, they were as if they were coming from the paradise(JANNAT). Normally if it was a dream, you would not smell a fragrance in the dreams. I understood that fragrance is received only in Yaqazas …The beauty of this fragrance was indescribable.

I pleaded : “What wind is that wind Oh My LORD(Ya RaBB)!

A Voice, filling the heavens said:  “The wind of the Most Beneficient and Most Merciful ONE (Rahmanu’r Rahiym)! “..

Then the tears glid down from both of my eyes. 

I was very relaxed but I was afraid of remaining alone! When I climbed a little more to the peak of the hill, I saw a single tree on the peak of the hill. It was thicker than a calf of the leg and thinner than the human body. It had a dark grey, ash coloured bark. It was lying upward and turning in to a hand shaped single leaf on its peak like a fig leaf making shadow. A strange tree! 

Under the tree, my teacher Muhammad SIDDIQ Hekim(k.s) was sitting with his left leg folded and his right knee up  by leaning his back to that tree and watching the storm below. He was facing north-west way. There was a Tasbih made of pearls in his hand and seven colours of rays were emanating from each tasbih bead. He was doing dhikr. You could see the limpid clouds below showing what is going on down the hill. I got very excited when I saw my teacher. I arrived near him by running but I was very exhausted. I was going to explain him what happened but it was as if my tounge got stuck in my throat. I could neither talk nor cry…

There is a carpet under my teacher like the ones from my village Aksaray. That carpet is a little bigger than a single prayer mat, and there was a space beside my teacher where a person could almost fit. 

My teacher pointed this space to me by his hand without looking at me and by continueing to watch below and said:             “Sit down My Son!..Sit down!..”

I explain these things to the people so that they can find it beneficial for themselves , that is why some parts are censored and I can’t remember.

I can not remember what happened here either. What I remember is we were surrounded by infinite amount of mountains and hills from every way in horizons. I said:

My teacher, have we been prisoned here for eternity? There is no road! There is no way! And there is no Sun in the sky. Everywhere is daylight but there is no Sun in the sky. There is no star nothing to find your way.”

My teacher turned his hand holding the tasbih towards the direction of the KIBLAH and a little further Rawda-al Mutahhara (Garden of Purity. Place in Madina where Prophet Muhammad PBUH’s tomb is ) was seen in the beam of Divine Light(Noor). It was emanating bright rays of light and we have seen it together, and at that moment:

Allahumma salli wa sallim wa barik al’a sayyidin’a Muhammadin Abdika wa Nabiyyika, wa Rasuluka wa Nabiyyi’l-Ummiyi wa al’a alihi, ahl-i baytihi wassahbihi!:

Oh My Allah, make Salat and Salam to our Master and Owner Muhammad (sallallahu alaihi wa sallam), who is your prophet(Nabi) and your Messenger (Rasul) and your ‘Ummi’ Prophet,  and  to his family, his ahl-i bayt, and his sahabas(disciples).”


Al hamdulillahi Rabbulalamiyn : Praise be to Allah, The Cherisher and Sustainer of the Worlds ! ”  we said..

As I was saying  the last syllable of “Lord of the Worlds: Rabbulalamiyn”,  I was in the masjid again and people were reciting qamat (internal call to the prayer) for the evening prayer and the man I saw was still sitting there in the same position. The people came and lifted him up from his place and he said some things to the people around him. I can’t remember what he said. When Imam said “Allahu akbar: God is Great “ he joined the prayer with the others. I joined to the prayer also. After the prayer, I couldn’t find my shoes. I searched for it where shoes are left in the masjid but there was no sign of my shoes. For a moment I  hesitated and thought to my self “Am I still living in other places and experiencing different places or what?” .  When I went outside of the Masjid, I found them on the edge of the pavement. I wore my shoes but I could not get to the ice cream shop. I walked home.

A day after, when I came to join the sohbat , my Teacher :

Now tell me my son, Abdullatif (Kulihvani) ! What happened?  Would the hand of some one trusting Rasulullah (SAWS) remain empty( would he be let down)? ALLAH j.j and the friends of ALLAH are trusting us, but we are being tested in our loyalty and trust in this test of servanthood in this life. May Allah j.j be our Guide and help us.” He said and prayed.

And the flood of Word-Sohbat-Zawk –Hazz kept flowing from heart to heart.

Now this zawk is a momento from that day…

With My Muhammadi Muhabbats.

Kul Ihvani

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